How to Write Your Query Blurb
I used to dread writing query blurbs for my novels. Now I love it. What changed? I realized that a good query follows a formula.
Whenever I work with clients on their submission package, I find that demonstrating how a blurb formula works can revolutionize their query. Ready to try it for yourself? Here are a few tips I often share with my clients about how to write your query blurb.
Wait, What’s a Query Blurb?
Glad you asked! The blurb is the most important part of your query letter. But first, let’s look at all the components of a query letter:
1) Intro paragraph
Do you have a connection to the agent you’re querying? For example, did you meet them at a conference, or do they represent your favorite author? If so, start your letter with one or two sentences about why you’re pitching to them, then use a transitional sentence like, “For this reason, I hope you’ll enjoy my novel, Novel Title.” If you don’t have a connection to this agent, don’t worry about it! In that case, you can start your letter with a simple sentence such as, “I’m seeking representation for my 89,000-word paranormal fantasy, Novel Title.”
2) Blurb
Here’s where you capture an agent’s interest with a short summary of your novel. (More on this soon.)
3) General information
This is a short paragraph that contains your word count (if you haven’t said it earlier), comp titles, and any potential for a trilogy/series, if applicable.
4) Short bio
Add a sentence or two about yourself. Don’t stress if you don’t have publication credits! Just introduce yourself (i.e., I’m a graphic artist living on the coast of France with a temperamental cat named Picasso.)
5) Closing
Thank them for their consideration, and you’re done! See how easy that was?
OK, How Do I Write This Query Blurb?
The purpose of the blurb is to give an overview of your novel and capture an agent’s interest—all within about 150-300 words, or 2-3 paragraphs. As Jane Friedman says, “By the end of the query, the reader should have an idea of why we care about the main character(s) but also the story problem or tension that keeps us turning pages.”
Think of a book similar to yours. Do you have a copy? If so, pull it out now and look at the jacket flap. If not, Google the title and find a description of it on a bookseller’s website. Read the description a few times. Notice how those 2-3 paragraphs tell you something about the characters, plot, and conflict, all while making you excited to buy the book? See how it ends with a cliffhanger, without revealing the end? That’s the style you want to use for your query blurb.
Two excellent formulas have influenced my approach: They are the Jane Friedman model and Jessica Brody’s Save the Cat Writes a Novel model.
In the Jane Friedman model, your blurb answers these questions:
Who is your main character (protagonist)?
What problem do they face?
What are the choices they must make?
What tension drives the story forward?
What does your character want?
Why do they want it?
What keeps them from getting it?
In the Save the Cat model, your blurb is structured based on a few key story beats, which you can read about here:
Paragraph 1 (2-4 sentences): Setup, Flawed Hero, and Catalyst
Paragraph 2 (2-4 sentences): Break Into 2 and/or Fun and Games
Paragraph 3 (1-3 sentences): Theme Stated, Midpoint hint and/or All is Lost hint, ending in a cliffhanger
Now, here’s the simplified formula I use:
1. A FLAWED CHARACTER and their GOAL/DESIRE
Who is your protagonist? What is their goal/desire? (Their goal/desire—i.e., what they want—is the most important part of your query, and the one I most often notice is missing from a client’s first draft. Pay special attention here.) This is also where you can hint at either their internal flaw or a problem they’re facing in their society; in other words, what’s holding your character back?
2. INCITING INCIDENT/CATALYST
What event kicks the story into motion and brings your character into a new world?
3. HINT OF AN EMOTIONAL ARC
To succeed in this new world as they pursue their goal, what does your character need to learn? (If you’ve mentioned their “flaw” earlier, this is where you hint at how they’ll need to overcome it.)
4. BIG PICTURE STAKES
What’s at stake for your character and/or their world if they fail to achieve their goal? (If you’re not sure what to put here, look at the Midpoint or All is Lost beats of your novel. That’s often where the stakes are raised.)
5. CLIFFHANGER
Leave us with a cliffhanger. Will your character will be able to overcome their internal flaw and achieve their goal? Remind us what’s at stake, or hint at a difficult choice they’ll have to make.
Example of a Great Query Blurb
Let’s apply these elements to one of my favorite blurbs: B.B. Alston’s Amari and the Night Brothers.
Amari Peters (CHARACTER) has never stopped believing her missing brother, Quinton, is alive. (DESIRE: Reunite with brother). Not even when the police told her otherwise, or when she got in trouble for standing up to bullies who said he was gone for good (Here, it’s not a FLAW, but a problem in her society she’ll have to overcome: People don’t believe in her.)
So when she finds a ticking briefcase in his closet (INCITING INCIDENT), containing a nomination for a summer tryout at the Bureau of Supernatural Affairs, she’s certain the secretive organization holds the key to locating Quinton (GOAL: locate brother)—if only she can wrap her head around the idea of magicians, fairies, aliens, and other supernatural creatures all being real.
Now she must compete for a spot against kids who’ve known about magic their whole lives. No matter how hard she tries, Amari can’t seem to escape their intense doubt (EMOTIONAL ARC: learning to believe in herself no matter what others say) and scrutiny—especially once her supernaturally enhanced talent is deemed “illegal.” With an evil magician threatening the supernatural world (BIG PICTURE STAKES), and her own classmates thinking she’s an enemy, Amari has never felt more alone. But if she doesn’t stick it out and pass the tryouts, she may never find out what happened to Quinton (CLIFFHANGER! Will she gain the trust in herself she needs to achieve her goal, or will she lose her brother forever?)
Wait! I Can’t Do This!
Yes, you can. Keep practicing. Read the blurbs of all your favorite novels. Dissect them according to the formulas I’ve shown you here. Try different formulas to see which fits your style best. And if you still find yourself struggling, take a look at your novel. Sometimes, if you’re having a hard time with a “beat” in your blurb, it’s because there’s something slightly off about your novel’s structure. That’s one of my favorite things about query blurbs: They’re not just useful to agents. They can help you get a birds-eye view of your story, too.
Questions? Emily Young loves talking about query blurbs. Contact her today for a free, 15-minute consultation! .